Notice: Closing This Site

It's been a long while since I've done any update here. I have come to realize it's hard for me to post about our homeschool on a regular basis since, well, to be honest, very few things out of the extraordinary happen from day to day. So instead of maintaining this blog and keeping it updated haphazardly, I am going to post about my homeschool journey on my regular blog: Helen's Random Thoughts.

Here's a link to a recent post there, which talks about the lessons I've learned after sending my homeschooled child into a regular high school, but not every post there will be homeschooling-related. Sorry about that.

I will keep this blog around for a few more weeks, but will eventually remove it. Thanks for tuning in.

ADD People Are Super Readers

I've been working through a book called, Right-Brained Children in a Left-Brained World: Unlocking the Potential of Your ADD Child by Jeffrey Freed. It mentions many things that I can identify in Chee Chee, and allows me to understand my son even better than before. However, what I did not expect is that it is also helping me understand my husband.

You see, the author states, from experience, that ADD people are highly gifted in certain areas, and they simply do not function like the average person. One such area is in reading. Now, I have always thought that people with ADD (and dyslexia) tend to be slow readers who struggle with every little word. However, according to Freed, that's the irony of it all. ADD and dyslexic people, who struggle when reading out loud, and who trip over small words from one line to the next, can actually be excellent high-speed readers. Once you throw the nitty-gritty out the window and focus on the big picture, then that's when ADD people can shine. Freed mentions that some of the teens he's coached can easily read a book that's several hundred pages long within a couple of hours--with comprehension. I wouldn't have believed these claims if I had not witnessed it in my husband, who's a prolific, published author, and has ADD and dyslexia, which were never diagnosed when he was young.

Sam does not enjoy reading out loud to our kids. When he reads, he gets tired and sleepy after only fifteen minutes. Over the years, that duty of reading to our boys at bed time gradually shifted entirely onto my lap. However, this man who seems to struggle with reading out loud for even fifteen minutes can gobble up fifteen textbook-sized tomes for his research within a week, while on vacation (and still go on outings, watch soccer, and generally relax and sleep a lot). When we visited with a friend in Colorado over the summer, he read half a dozen of her books, all in a couple of days amidst conversations, outings, World Cup, and meals.

I used to think he simply browsed these books for the sections he needed rather than read them from cover to cover. After reading the Right-Brained book, I am beginning to believe that ADD people have super-human speed-reading abilities. This would explain how Sam can publish half a dozen books in one year (with all the research required) and still teach full-time and be a dad.

It seems that ADD and dyslexia in general wreak havoc in children in primary and secondary schools, because in those years learning is all about building simple aptitudes like reading clearly, spelling accurately, and multiplying numbers precisely. However, as one progresses beyond these simple tasks to higher-level mental activities, such as research, analysis, synthesis, and creating new ideas, then ADD people really do thrive. Of course, by then, they will have been told hundreds of times by dozens of people how "disabled" they are, and how unsuccessful they'll be. What a shame!

Homeschool of One

When Poly went off to high school, I was feeling rather forlorn about what was left of our homeschool. What would it be like to have only one child to teach? Would we be facing complete silence instead of lively discussions, now that my talkative child is gone? Could we still manage our worship time and singing? How does one transition from teaching at the older child's level (and having the younger child join in) to teaching directly at the younger child's level? I felt like we were getting off of a motorboat and re-packing to set off on a two-man raft. It would be very quiet, very slow, and very lonely.

The first day that happened, it did feel strange and surreal. During our Bible time, we felt Poly's absence acutely. There were no comments, no interruptions, no answers to questions. Chee-Chee, who generally relied on his brother to do the talking, kept to his reserved and passive self.

As time went on, however, we both got used to a new routine. And I began to like this homeschool of one. I feel more relaxed now that I only need to focus on one person's learning needs. When Chee-Chee sits next to me to read, I can wrap my arm around him, and we take as long as we need. When I address him and no one else, Chee-Chee begins to respond. Whereas in the past, he was always afraid of saying things wrong, he now feels safe to give his opinions and answers without an older brother's censure. Gradually, my little guy, whose favorite animal has always been the tortoise, is poking his head out of his shell. These days I love our one-on-one discussions about all kinds of issues. I am constantly surprised by his keen observations and analytical formulations. Smart, motivated, and compliant, he is a joy to teach.

Without other distractions, I am able to think clearly and to beef up Chee-Chee's curriculum, and he has risen to the challenge. In the past years, sadly, I had been short-changing his education. Being too aware of his older brother's strengths and Chee's learning disabilities, I had for too long held off giving challenging work to Chee in order to protect him from frustrations. Recently we began on the IEW writing program, and after only a couple of weeks, I am astounded by how well he can write, given the right stimuli.

Changes can be scary. This year is all about changes for us. In fact, it was as if our homeschool went through a tornado. Not only have we been blown all the way across the Pacific Ocean, severed from our support system and friends, and stripped off all the niceties of a nourishing homeschooling environment, we had to down-size as well. We had to let Poly go, setting him free to learn in a new way. However, it was all for the best. Now I know it was the right thing to do. For Poly and Chee, it was the best thing that could have happened for them both.

Two Weeks to Go

Poly got accepted to an international school. We were all very happy about it--Poly especially so. As the starting date draws near (August 20th), I am increasingly aware that my Polynesia is flapping his wings and ready to fly away. He is a big boy now--almost the same size as his father. They wear the same-size shoes. And I feel like wrapping him up in a little bundle and holding him in my bosom for a little while longer, but he's already too big for that.

The fact is, there's no good time for letting go. When you homeschool, you think you can keep them under your wings and feed them all the good things you can possibly think of, because there is so much time, so very much time between now and then. There is so much you want to give them, things you have, and things you don't have but might acquire in the future. Yet, there is not enough time. Even if I had another twenty years, I would still say, "It's not enough time!"

At the beginning of this summer I began to wonder what would I want to teach my kid in the last two months of our time together as teacher-student? What would I want him to know while I still have his undivided attention for a few weeks? The question paralyzed me because it was impossible. There is so much more I want to teach him! Yet, nothing will fit neatly into a two-month period. No knowledge, no wisdom is nicely bundled like that. So we ended up continuing on as we had all year, as if comes September we will start like we always have.

I will miss him, my star student (both my students are stars). I guess if there's one thing I want him to know before he leaves for school, it is that although our time is finite, our relationship doesn't have to be. Although I don't get to select his curriculum any more or dictate what he learns from now on, I can still be his life-coach, his friend, and his biggest fan. I want him to know, though I don't say it nearly as much as I should, just how proud I am of him and what a privilege it's been to be his teacher and that if I had to do it all over again, I would still jump in in a heart beat.

The Literary Analysis Paper

Contrary to what many think, giving Poly a writing assignment is never an easy task. It is true that he is an eloquent writer for a thirteen-year-old. However, he is also perfectionistic and stubborn about what he thinks is a proper assignment. Thus whenever I give him a writing assignment, he often comes back and tries to negotiate the assignment. Our discussion ususally turns into a stalemate with many tears. Besides, he can never stick to a deadline because every writing assignment ends up being a semester project, another magnum opus. I suppose that is one disadvantage to homeschooling. As a mother, I'm too flexible and soft-hearted, and he knows he can bend the rules. So, in general, to minimize conflict and frustration, Poly gets only one writing assignment every term.

I'd decided that this semester he would have to write a literary analysis paper since I had listed American literature as one of the subjects on his school record. We had just finished reading Uncle Tom's Cabin. I asked him to compare and contrast the three slaveowners Tom had. Yesterday afternoon he came to me, almost in tears (again), complaining that he does not want to write it according to the outline we'd agreed on. "It's stupid," he said. We ended up spending the next two hours arguing over the assignment: why it's doable or not doable, why it's stupid or not stupid, etc. After two hours of precious time--personal time I had allotted for my Bible study preparation--I was no closer to convincing him that the assignment is sound, and that one can make a good paper out of it. I even pulled some sample compare-contrast papers off the internet for him, to no avail.

Finally, to prove to him that I would never give him an assignment that is not doable, I told him I'd crank out a paragraph right then and there just for him. "When I'm done, I don't want to hear any more excuses!" I said. So I sat down in front of my computer at six in the evening. Instead of making dinner I wrote a 280-word paragraph. "Tell me," I said as I handed the paper to him, "does that look stupid to you?"

After that real-time demonstration, Poly went quietly back to the drawing board. He actually said "thanks" to me for showing him how it's done.

As homeschoolers we pull out all the stops to motivate our children. I doubt that any teacher of English would do an assignment on demand just to prove a point. Of course, I wonder, too, if Poly would bulk at an assignment this much if he were in an English class with twenty other kids. I wonder how other homeschoolers teach high-school literature? Do they have an easier time handing out assignments?

Kids Say the Funniest Things

Chee-Chee and I are studying about the events leading up to the Civil War. When we talked about the Missouri Compromise and why the North and the South both wanted a say in which way the new states would go, Chee-Chee said, "Why didn't the Southern states just divide themselves into smaller states, then they could send more senators to the Congress?"

Sometimes I think we under-estimate the cognitive capability of our little ones.

Favorite Part of the Day

My teenager tells me his favorite part of the day is when we read The Lord of the Rings together at bedtime. Of course, Tolkien is not part of our normal curriculum. It is simply something we do for fun. We have never ceased our night-time read-aloud routine, even when Poly is fully capable of reading literature on his own and easily possesses a wider speaking vocabulary than I do.

Andrew Pudewa of Institute for Excellence in Writing once spoke in a seminar about the importance of reading aloud to children (even older children). There's nothing better than hearing complex, beautiful language constructs spoken out loud in helping your children become naturally eloquent speakers. What you read gets reflected in how you write; what you hear, then, is reflected in how you speak. These days, we often take turns reading. Poly is a wonderful reader, creating different voices and accents for the various characters. His deep voice makes a far more convincing imitation of Gandalf or Gimli than I can ever do. Of course, I don't tell him he's also sharpening his oratory skills while having fun.

Most of all, though, we do it just because it's so enjoyable. Literature is fun. It's a far more active and entertaining pasttime than computer games or TV programs--at least to me. To hear Poly say that this is his favorite part of the day means a lot to me. It tells me we're doing something right.